Beyonce “Pretty Hurts” & Overcoming
“Pretty Hurts” by Beyonce is a song that targets women who are influenced by the image of others to define beauty. There were times in my life where I felt like I wasn’t as pretty as I wanted to be. My self-esteem was very low because I depended on other people to validate me. It’s hard for women to feel good about themselves and to look good for others. This song relates to me because I try to fix things that are not broken, and I work hard to keep myself in shape. I also try to make every detail about me perfect and what others think of me pressures me to want to look better.
Beyonce states that “We try to fix something, but you can’t fix what you can’t see” (Beyonce). This part of the song inspires me to be happy with the things that I can’t see that aren’t the worst. I experienced a lot of teasing in middle school, high school, and even now with my image. I tried fixing things about myself that I didn’t like, and a lot of times the things I don’t like need to be left alone. I have this sense of urgency, where I have to fix it and if I don’t, it breaks me down. Ever since I was little, my two front teeth were bigger than the rest of my teeth. I never knew the reason why they grew that way, but they really had a big impact on me. I use to get picked on a lot in school because of it. Children would call me Rat, Bucky and Buck Tooth; it would hurt me. It was tearing me up inside, although I never expressed my feelings to others. I never had the courage to tell anybody about it, and even though I’m older I still meet people that pick on me. However, I don’t let it affect me like it did when I was little.
Some people think that people who are skinny don’t have trouble with keeping their body in shape, but in reality we do. We have to work very hard to keep ourselves the same size. Verse two of the song, states “Blonder hair, flat chest TV says, “Bigger is better”; South beach, sugar free vogue says, “Thinner is better” (Beyonce). Beyonce is basically saying that TV and magazines advertise women beauty as bigger and thinner being better. Coming from a family of women with big chests and big derrieres had a bigger impact on me. My sister derriere is bigger than mine; and in high school a lot of the boys that were my age used to talk about how big my sister derriere and chest were, and why mine wasn’t that big. I hated the fact that my derriere and chest weren’t as big as I wanted, I wasn’t getting the attention she was getting, and I felt pessimistic. So, I started eating more hoping that I would gain weight in my derriere and chest area, but as it turns out I couldn’t gain the weight. My friends told me that they would kill to have the shape that I have, and that my derriere, and chest are the perfect size for me. Deep down I still felt like having those assets would make me look better, but I’m still trying to accept those features.
I felt like I needed everything to be perfect. I wanted my face and body to be as clear as day. I didn’t like the fact that different parts of me are different shades of brown. I thought that I needed to dress up in school to be as popular as all the other girls at my school. I always dressed plain Jane in high school, and girls that were my age dressed like they were adults; and I wanted to dress that way as well. When I first started wearing eyeglasses, I felt like my eyeglasses were holding me back from being pretty, and if I had to wear eyeglasses, my eyes weren’t as perfect as they should be. Beyonce explains that “Perfection is a disease of a nation.” I grew to learn that being fashionable doesn’t make me perfect. My body being different shades doesn’t say that I don’t have a perfect body, and wearing eyeglasses doesn’t state that my eyes aren’t perfect; it just states that they’re stronger.
The people around me that bullied me made me feel like I wasn’t a beautiful girl, and that’s what tears me apart mostly. I depended on their opinions a lot, and that’s what led me to wanting to change my image. My family and friends tell me all the time that I am a pretty girl and what others said about my chest, derriere, and skin color doesn’t matter. As stated in this song, “What’s in your head, it doesn’t matter, Brush your hair, fix your teeth. What you wear is all that matters”(Beyonce). If I’m comfortable in my own skin and happy with my inner and outer self, then that’s all that should matter to me.
It takes a lot of work for women to be confident with themselves, and a lot of the negative people don’t make it easier on women who have trouble with their image. I make progress every year with accepting my big front teeth, little chest, little derriere, eyeglasses, the color of my skin and wardrobe, but there are times where I still struggle with accepting them. I have a lot of positive people around me, and with that in mind, I’m at a stand point where what others say doesn’t define my beauty. Being my natural self is what defines my beauty. When I first heard “Pretty Hurts”, it really touched me because the words that Beyonce expressed were what I was feeling for some years now. Even today this song helps me get through what I’ve been trying to accept about myself. So, I ask myself this question every day, “Are you happy with yourself Destiny?” “Yes”.
Read it and Weep 